In an effort to be even more open and honest, I’ve decided to share something that I’m not necessarily proud of. I’m sure it’s nothing new, but regardless, I felt compelled. You see, I have “Good” Mommy days and I have “Bad” Mommy days.
A “Good” Mommy day can only be described as, motherhood at its finest. On a “Good” Mommy day I’m up before the kid. I get to have at least 3 cups of coffee, and at least 30 minutes of me time before she awakes. When I hear her sweet little voice saying, “Momma….Mommaaaa”, I’m actually glad she’s awake, and ready to start the day.
I greet her with a smile and a kiss, and she greets me back. We hold hands as we walk out into the living room, exchanging sweet sentiments, and talking about what a good night we both had. We enjoy breakfast together, and talk about all the fun things we’re going to do.
Throughout the day we laugh, and we play. We take long walks in the yard, and I explain the difference between dog poop and deer poop. We then enjoy a good healthy lunch, one that we both agree on. We poo-poo and pee-pee in the potty, sometimes even in the yard if we have to.
We wash dishes together, sort through the laundry together, relax and cuddle on the couch with Curious George. It’s complete and total bliss. We end our evening with a nice relaxing bath, a book, and a kiss good night….
Then there’s the “Bad” Mommy days….
BEEP, BEEP, BEEP, BEEP…..
“Seriously! WTH! I swear I just fell asleep!” I hit the snooze button and I close my eyes once again. Just two more seconds and I’ll be ready to start the day.
“You’ve GOT to be kidding ME! It’s only 6:30!”
Except that it’s not. It’s actually 7:30, and my 2 seconds turned into an entire hour that I can never get back!
Me: “I’m coming Z!”
Me: “I’m COMING!”
I stumble through the living room, smash my toe on the coffee table, and crash through her bedroom door.
Me: “Morning Z.”
Z: “Wet Momma, all wet!”
Oh NO, not again! Sure enough, Z was sleep-stripping once again last night and managed to tear her diaper off. The sheets and all 1500 blankets that she insists on sleeping with are completely soaked!
Then the PANIC sets in….not the snuggies, please GOD, not the snuggies! Sure enough, her two favorite security blankets are soaked through as well.
Z: “No wash Momma, NO wash!”
Me: “Honey they’re wet, I have to wash them.”
Z: “NOOOO WASH MOMMA, NO WASH!”
She rips them out of my hands.
I then calmly explain to her that we’re just going to let them hang dry, knowing full well that I will have to sneak back into her room ninja style, get the blankets and smuggle them into the wash machine.
When we finally make it to the kitchen I suggest a nice breakfast, cereal and toast. Z suggests we watch Curious George and drink juice. It’s not really worth the argument. She knows I have ZERO will power in the morning, and she takes full advantage of it. As I turn on George I make a mental note to work on that, but for now, George is my hero, and I can finally get my first cup of coffee.
Throughout the rest of the day we continue to argue. I try to explain to her that the wash machine is not the enemy. Stupid front loaders! She refuses to leave the laundry room! She just sits there, watching her snuggies go around and around, reminding me every 30 seconds that she’s mad at me because I fed her snuggies to the evil wash machine.
We argue over lunch, and she refuses to get dressed to go outside. I finally turn the TV back on and collapse on the couch, secretly relieved that she doesn’t want to go outside.
By the time evening rolls around, I’m clock-watching. I can’t WAIT for bed time! Not just hers, but mine too.
I skip bath time because I’m too lazy to clean out the tub, and when story time comes around, I pick out the smallest book I can find and then proceed to skip pages when she’s not looking.
When she asks for another cup of milk, I don’t even argue. I just fill it up and hand it back to her, knowing full well that I’ll have yet another set of sheets and blankets to wash in the morning.
“Bad” Mommy day’s are the worst! I wish every day could be a “Good” Mommy day, I really do, but that’s just not possible, at least not for me. I tell myself it’s okay, every Mom has a “Bad” Mommy day every once in a while. Besides, if every day was perfect, we’d have nothing to look forward too.